ACTION JACKSON TO THE RESCUE ...

ACTION JACKSON TO THE RESCUE ...
by The Iconoclast

April 2, 2002

Well golly gee, look who's in the news again: America's unofficial secretary of state in waiting and Taliban favorite, the dishonorable Jesse "Shakedown" Jackson (right).

According to the latest Yahoo news reports, the irrepressible Reverend Jackson was so alarmed about the well-being of Yasser Arafat after Israeli military forces surrounded and then entered Mr. Araft's office building, the self-styled diplomat called a press conference. And America's most renowned amateur international diplomat immediately urged President Bush to protect Yasser Arafat, saying he feared "the Middle East will erupt in war if Israelis kill the Palestinian leader."

Well really now. Who said anything about killing Yasser Arafat? The Israelis seemed to go out of their way at the outset of their incursion to assure the world that little Yasser wouldn't be harmed. That's right, even the Israeli Prime Minister stressed to reporters that not a hair on Yasser's balding head would be rearranged.

But really, who cares what Jesse Jackson thinks about the Middle East or any other foreign-policy matter anyway? What is it about this strange, narcissistic man that makes him think his opinion is of any value in matters like this? After all, as the latest expose on CNN's favorite fast-talking reverend has revealed (Shakedown: Exposing the Real Jesse Jackson, Kenneth R. Timmerman), his real expertise lies in such domestic pursuits as fraud, corporate shakedowns and shameless self-promotion. And -- according to this depressing account of his career -- when it comes to cooking the books, Jesse and his friends can probably give Arthur Andersen and the crooks at Enron a run for their money (or should we rephrase that as a run for other people's money).

Anyway, here's the real howler from the latest Yahoo news story on Action Jackson's valiant efforts on behalf of the little Arab guy. According to this report, a panicked Reverend Jackson emphasized that the United States and the United Nations "have the burden and capacity to move in" to keep Yasser Arafat from being killed. But Reverend Jackson added that "he had not been able to get through to the White House."

Oh my goodness, the world is surely doomed. Reverend Jesse Jackson was not able to get through to the White House and give the likes of Condaleeza Rice, Colin Powell and the inimitable Rummy the benefit of his unique expertise and perspective on world affairs. What will the Bush administration do now, forced to cope with this cataclysmic foreign-policy crisis without the counsel of America's most knowledgable expert on international relations (with repressive dictators)? And what was the wisdom that Action Jackson was going to pass onto Colin Powell and the State Department anyway -- that the best way to get Ariel Sharon to co-operate is to threaten to boycott El Al Airlines and call the Israelis 'racists' and other naughty names until they agreed to spare little Yasser's life and fork over a 'donation' of a few hundred-thousand dollars to Jackson's favorite black charity -- himself?

It boggles the mind to realize that the mainstream media of this continent still hang onto every word uttered by this self-promoting blowhard and self-appointed spokesperson for, well, really no-one except himself. The media seem to feel obliged to report every word he says, most likely because -- in their minds -- he's "one of them" (meaning he is consistently anti-American in his rhetoric and usually expresses political viewpoints to the left of Karl Marx).

We get to hear every iditiotic word Jesse Jackson has to say about the issues of the day, even though his outrageous utterances usually only provoke smirks, or just plain laughter, from the majority of the American people who have to endlessly endure these ruminations in fawning radio news interviews, daily newspaper reports and nightly TV newscasts.

Yes, somehow the mainstream media always seem to find the equivalent of front-page space for the latest extremist rhetoric from the self-promoting reverend of rhyme. But here's something to ponder. If they can always find room for the latest Action Jackson howlers, how come the mainstream media can't find the space to report that there is no evidence to date that Mr. Jackson ever graduated from a recognized divinity school? How come they've never found the time to point out that Jesse Jackson -- imagining himself, in his narcissistic fantasies, as a full-fledged man of the cloth and the only rightful successor to Martin Luther King -- most likely added the title, Reverend, before his surname arbitrarily?

And even if they're not anxious to question Action Jackson's theological credentials, how come these same media mavens haven't at least taken the time to investigate the many charges made, through the years, that this self-appointed man of the cloth associated with and promoted the interests of various African and Middle East dictators in return for the one thing in life that seems to concern him most, hard cash? Or how about the outrageous protection racket he's run against American corporations over the years -- threatening to label them racist and promote a boycott of their products if they don't come up with massive cash donations to Jackson-controlled 'non-profit' organizatons dedicated to "racial justice", which basically means lucrative salaries and cash dividends for Jesse Jackson, his mistresses and close associates?

There is some good news on the Action Jackson front, though. Based on what's happened so far, one would surmise that Jesse Jackson will never, in the coming days, get through to the White House, or Colin Powell, or even Barney the presidential pooch. In fact, if they've got the equivalent of call display at the Bush White House, you can be sure that every time the good reverend calls, they just roll their eyes and let the phone ring and ring and ring.

Of course, that won't discourage Jesse. He'll just keep calling the boys and girls at Yahoo News, the New York Times and the Washington Post, whining about all the bad things that are about to happen to poor little Yasser and how the Bush administration isn't doing a thing to help him, and how he (Jesse Jackson) is willing to fly to Jerusalem to act as a mediatior in this horrid international dispute (just as he selflessly flew to Washington to counsel Bill Clinton during the Monigate scandal).

Of course, what we all would rather hear is that Reverend Jackson is going to somehow go away, disappear or fade into the woodwork and never make another media appearance again. Now that would be a selfless contribution to humanity worthy of a true social dogooder. ***

Photo of Jesse "Shakedown" Jackson courtesy of staff files