Ask O.J.

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Ask O.J.
by Radley Balko

The Juice is back, this time on the Internet. Fresh off his stunning performance on Fox News' "The Fox Report," in which he accused the sister of his dead wife, Nicole Brown Simpson, of whoring her sister's death, being a welfare queen, and of bitterness over the fact that he had never slept with her, O.J. is now hocking his wares and his story on the website AskOJ.com.

What great gift ideas! Among the items you can buy, a signed 8 x 10 of the Juice himself ($100.00), an official signed NFL football ($185.00), a replica Buffalo Bills jersey ($349.00), a replica USC helmet ($249.00), and an inscribed Heisman panel where, for $165.00, you can get a message such as "Go Trojans!", "Rose Bowl MVP", or "Peace to You" emblazoned on your little piece of the O.J. experience.

Further down on the site there is the "Did You Know?" section, where you're treated to little nuggets of O.J.'s esteemed career - items like "Did you know O.J. was awarded the Heisman Trophy in 1968?"; "Did you know O.J. was the NFL's leading rusher in 1972?"; and "Did you know O.J. was inducted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame in 1985?"

It would read like a twelve-year-old's adoring fan site, if it weren't so damned creepy. You half expect ads selling size 12 Bruno Magli's or undersized Isotoner gloves. Maybe they haven't thought of that yet.

For $7.95 you can reserve yourself an e-seat at the O.J. "Live Event," in which he will answer questions from "you, the public." This, we're told, is a great opportunity because on the day of the event, tickets will jump to $9.95. And in case you're short on cash, a console pops up upon entering the site in which you're encouraged to apply for a pre-approved credit card.

"Don't miss this live event", the site says, "where you can ask O.J. your own personal questions!"

Well, maybe. The site goes on to explain that, due to the inevitable volume of questions, "Mr. Simpson will view all questions as they are presented and when he sees that many people are asking the same or a similar question, he will answer it." Translation: O.J. will answer whatever questions he damned well pleases.

Even more interesting are the links from the site, all of them to web-sites owned and operated by an outfit called Entertainment Network, Inc.

The first ad link is to a web page called Their Side.com. Their Side purports to be "an open forum where celebrities and other public figures can tell their side of the story completely unedited and uncensored." Problem is, Their Side is struggling for content. There isn't one public figure testimonial, save for the link back to AskOJ.

One link that is functional from Their Side is an ad for yet another site called Hollywood Gossip.com. Hollywood Gossip is also run by Entertainment Network, Inc., and is a sewer of rumor and innuendo, the very sort of filth our friends at Entertainment Network, Inc. are trying to give celebrities the chance to deflect at Their Side.

Get it? Dish the dirt on one site, let the stars respond on the other.

Among Hollywood Gossip's stories are a prostitute who claims Jack Nicholson beat her up, a piece on Anna Nicole Smith and a hotel sex tape, and provocative headline that reads, "Death, Jail or Rehab, Choices for Troubled Superstars."

Dubiously, the folks at Entertainment Network, Inc. add a disclaimer to all these sites assuring us that they take no position on any celebrity's public or private foibles, including O.J.'s guilt or innocence.

They just want to make money off of them.

As for O.J., he has promised to donate "most" of the money he makes from AskOJ.com to charity. How much is "most?" To what charity? O.J. hasn't been forthcoming. It's a safe bet, however, that proceeds won't be going to the Goldmans or the Browns. O.J. has yet to pay the first nickel of the civil damages he owes them, despite raking in $4 million every year from judgment-proof pensions.

O.J. is fed up with the way Denise Brown and Fred Goldman have gone on national television and besmirched his good name. He told Fox News he feels they've shamed themselves by profiting from the murders of Nicole and Ron Goldman. He said he's going to start fighting back.

You can help him in his fight by logging on to his site and buying a replica Bills helmet. Get your credit card ready, it's just $399.