The Mayor as Art Critic

The Mayor as Art Critic
by Mitch Frank

Just when you think New York City Mayor Rudolph Giuliani has exhausted the supply of people he hates, he goes and finds someone else to pick a fight with. Just when you think Rudy, as most New Yorkers call him (although others have better four letter nicknames), has fought so many battles for so long and spewed so much sarcasm and vitriol at so many targets that he’s finally going to collapse in exhaustion and suddenly realize other people are not so bad, he decides to attack another unsuspecting target. Apparently, beating up on an art museum is easier than attacking the first lady. But don’t worry, he’ll get around to that.

First, let me explain what I’m talking about. Giuliani launched an all-out attack on the Brooklyn Museum of Art last week. Now even though I live in Brooklyn, unlike most New Yorkers, I don’t believe the rest of the country lives to hear about the Big Apple. But Rudy is running for the Senate next year, even though he has yet to formally declare. And this Senate race, which just happens to feature the First Lady of the United States as his Democratic opponent, will be the most talked about in America.

Now most people know more than they ever want to about Hillary Clinton – her hairstyles, dressing habits, husband’s hobbies, favorite dead first ladies to chat with - but what about Rudy? Is he well known outside New York?

Well, if he is, it’s mostly for fighting.

First, the mayor fought crime. And nobody had a problem with that because it was a big reason they elected the former federal prosecutor. And he fought crime with a vengeance. And crime went down. Then he fought the recession. And even though he did it by giving big business in New York anything it wanted, no one complained because the economy did get better.

But then Rudy ran out big targets. So he attacked the strip club and pornography industry in New York. And no one complained, especially since most patrons of those industries didn’t want to be seen protesting. And then the mayor attacked cab drivers. And then he attacked street vendors and street artists. And then he attacked jaywalkers. And then he told everyone they had to be more polite to each other. And New Yorkers started to think this was a bit odd coming from a man who once mocked a mentally ill caller on his weekly public access TV show. And then even his crime fighting became a problem as police officers started shooting a disproportionate number of innocent black men with a disproportionate number of bullets.

And then the Brooklyn Museum of Art decided to open a show called “Sensation.” The show had been a big success in London two years ago where it generated a lot of buzz. And it’s not hard to see why. The show features quite a few dead animals in tanks of formaldehyde. It also features a painting of the Virgin Mary covered with pornographic magazine images and clumps of elephant dung.

Well, understandably, this upset Rudy, who is a Roman Catholic. Now, most people, when offended by such controversial art, usually show their disapproval by using their constitutional right to stay home. At most, they might organize a boycott of the museum. But when you’re the mayor of New York, why play around?

So Rudy told the museum to cancel the exhibit. The museum’s director, Arnold Lehman, said no. And Rudy followed by threatening to cut the city’s funding to the museum, have the entire museum board fired, and evict the museum from its Brooklyn location. As Rudy put it, “Public taxpayer dollars should not go for aggressive desecration of national or religious symbols.”

Well, it’s good to know the mayor is handling this issue with the maturity and stature he’s well known for.

And while this may seem like a small matter, it raises an important issue for Giuliani’s Senate run next year because it highlights a key personality problem he has – He’s not a nice guy.

Being a U.S. Senator is a tough job. It calls for a person who is willing to work with others, to talk things out, and to compromise when necessary. All of these are qualities learned on childhood playgrounds, and I think Rudy was busy beating up squirrels at the time.

Rudy is not very open minded when it comes to other people’s points of view. He never bothered to ask the artist’s intent in the offending painting. It turns out the creator of the offending Virgin Mary, Chris Ofili, a British artist of Nigerian descent, is a Catholic. In Nigeria, elephant dung is a sacred symbol of growth and renewal. And even if Rudy did not accept this answer, he might have talked with the museum board to let them know how upset he was. Instead he issued an ultimatum.

In the end, however, it all comes down to the question of whether or not tax dollars should fund art. On this question, Rudy actually has a lot of allies in the Senate – Jessie Helms (R-NC), for example.

Republicans in Congress have been trying to kill funding for the National Endowment for the Arts and for the Public Broadcasting Corporation for years now. The drive first started gaining steam when Robert Maplethorpe took a few controversial pictures. It didn’t help when Republicans found out recently that several PBS stations were giving donations to Democratic candidates. How this happened, I have no idea. I think two PBS station chiefs were sitting together one day when they both shuddered. One said, “I have a sudden urge to cut my own foot off with a machete.” The other said, “Me too. But let’s just give money to the Democratic Party instead.”

Now, I understand why conservatives don’t like giving money to artists and public television. They feel the arts are dominated by liberal elitist snobs. And to a certain degree, they’re right. I always feel intellectually superior after I watch a 47-hour Ken Burns documentary on the history of field hockey.

But the United States gives less in tax dollars to the arts than almost any other Western nation – about $1.12 for PBS and $.63 for the NEA from each taxpayer each year. And is helping support culture and beauty in this nation such a bad cause?

So in the playground spirit of compromise, I have a solution for Republican art critics. If they double the funding for PBS and the NEA and stop bitching about liberal elitism, PBS and the NEA should offer some fare that’s a little more friendly to mainstream audiences. PBS could start by devoting a few hours each day to such programming as WWF wrestling, Cops, and Baywatch. And the NEA could launch a nationwide tour of dogs playing poker and velvet Elvis paintings. PBS ratings and museum attendance would soar, and the increased funding would go to some worthy causes, like buying those female pro wrestlers and lifeguards even larger breast implants. Not to mention, I love velvet Elvi.

As for Rudy’s little dispute with the Brooklyn Museum, I don’t have much of an answer. Rudy might remember this – once the government decides to fund the arts, it’s not its job to decide what art is good and what art is bad. Similarly, once the city elected him, no one refused to pay their taxes just because he started acting like a playground bully.

I would argue that we should increase arts funding in New York so the Mayor could use some for art he likes – but his only desire seems to be for a larger Yankee Stadium and a lot of statues of himself. Anyone know if Hillary likes art?

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