Finding a Seat on the Gravy Train Called Affirmative Action

Finding a Seat on the Gravy Train Called Affirmative Action
by Lisa Woerly

I regret the day I casually told a group of coworkers that I am part Native American. I was asked why I don't capitalize on my minority status by some of my more brazen coworkers who consider themselves "empathetic to [my] people's cause." (Huh? Did they have a moment of epiphany during Dances With Wolves? Hanging a dream catcher over your bedroom window does not make you a proponent of Native American rights, so save me the rhetoric.)

Using my minority status as a means to get ahead made me laugh. After all, what minority status? Hell, the Cherokee Nation won't even accept me as one of their own because I am only 1/16 Cherokee, and I can't say that I blame them for rejecting me. I know practically nothing about my Native American heritage, and I cannot properly trace my ancestral heritage to verify the accuracy of those six cups of Indian blood pulsing through my veins. How could I, in good conscience, even attempt to profit in the workplace from my partial minority status?

Thus, I have always followed the whites around, integrating myself as one of them - which 15/16 of me is. Which means true minorities sound the battle cry that I am granted full benefits in Corporate America as a "white" woman while they are relegated to the back cubicles and lower-paying jobs in our company. What benefits? Use of the company Lear jet? Privileges to the VP private dining room? The only benefits I seem to garner these days are fifty-hour workweeks, bad vending machine coffee, and network server problems.

When we speak of Affirmative Action these days, it seems to go without saying that we are only referring to African Americans. Granted, I think it's our moral obligation to at least attempt atonement for the sins of our slave-owning fathers (that occasional bleeding-heart liberal in me is showing itself), but is Affirmative Action really the answer? What about Hispanics? Asians? Native Americans? These people seem to have fallen through the cogs of the Affirmative Action wheels and have been left behind with dust in their mouths.

Proponents of Affirmative Action love to state that it's about time African Americans got a fair shake in this country. They talk about the justice that will be derived from a "fair playing field" and that we, as whites, owe African Americans a step up on the ladder to success. But what Affirmative Action really seems to support are more union labor jobs like plumbing, pipe fitting, and construction - not managers, vice presidents, and CEOs (remember Nixon's Philadelphia Plan?). Affirmative Action is subtly saying that they'll stand by a minority's right to a fair shot at a job, but only if that job meets certain criteria. How does that behavior encourage a "fair playing field?"

Affirmative Action has managed to debase itself and it has metastasized into that which it proposes to hate - discrimination. Affirmative Action only seems to care about African Americans, and it only seems to care about defending an African American's right to fair employment within a certain sector of America's workforce. Yes, we want an African American brick layer. No, we don't want an African American as Vice President of Manufacturing for a large S & P 500 company. And that is just what Affirmative Action's mission statement really says - and it's there for Americans to see if we'll just open our eyes to the truth.

Same education, same work experience. Different color of skin. What's the pecking order these days? White, black, yellow, brown, and lastly red? Switching colors around on the hierarchy won't solve your problems. When JFK first used the phrase Affirmative Action his intention was that no one would be discriminated against in the workplace due to race, color, or creed.

JFK's vision became law with the Civil Rights Act of 1964. The theory was fair, good, and true - discrimination against any race will not be tolerated. But as human beings are wont to do, we have debased, prostituted, and ridiculed the theoretical fairness that should have come from Affirmative Action. Affirmative Action has not helped America. It's become a crutch for people looking for an easy way. It forsakes one race for another; it imports one color over another. That is not an "equal playing field."

Note to America: Stop trying to jump on the gravy train of Affirmative Action by claiming your pinky finger has minority blood in it, step aside, and walk on your own two feet to your destination. Find your own teepee to stage an equal opportunity protest in front of because this teepee is all filled up. It's filled up with sixteen 1/16 Native Americans. If my small-town secondary education served its purpose, that's one whole Indian.

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